“We are artists, scientists, and pragmatists…”

We here at Traction believe that everything is interactive, and that we are an amalgam of effort that results in an unbreakable creative and strategic concrete. We believe that there is no obstacle we cannot surmount if we take advantage of our most valuable asset - each other. In this spirit, we have been participating in a collective Scientific endeavor to expand the frontiers of the human experience, one that we are sure will etch our names into the marble halls of posterity for all time. That effort is a Scientific torch illuminating the darkness of mankind’s ignorance. It’s a torch we like to call Beer Science.

Beer Science found its origins a couple of years ago, when our Creative Director, Theo Fanning, bellowed out the dubious claim that, "TECATE IS THE BEST MEXICAN BEER THERE IS!" It was politely suggested that he wouldn't be able to tell a Tecate from a Corona if he couldn't see the label, to which he balked, "OH, YES I COULD!" And so we set out to test that claim.

Lab coats were starched and pressed. Notepads were fastened to clipboards. Scorecards were meticulously designed and pencils were laboriously sharpened. Six common Mexican lagers were chosen from the local liquor store and poured delicately into clear plastic cups marked ‘A’ through ‘F’. Participants were told to rank each beer from 0 to 5 (0 being worst, 5 being best) in each of six categories: Appearance, Aroma, Flavor, Mouthfeel, Drinkability and Overall*. Thoroughly unenjoyable crackers were provided to act as palette cleansers, and qualified testing staff were briefed on methodologies that ensured testing would be conducted in the most thorough and efficient way possible. 

When the day of the event came there was a palpable tension in the air. Everyone present could sense the momentous nature of what was taking place, and set their hands to the task with an admirably sober gravitas. Despite this general nervousness, however, testing was conducted without incident and Science was handily accomplished.

The results of the scoring were tabulated and, unsurprisingly, it turns out Theo was wrong about Tecate after all, but that’s hardly the point. More importantly, we knew that if we carried on conducting Science in this way we might have a chance to contribute to humankind’s overall body of Scientific knowledge of and appreciation for delicious, delicious beer; and so we have carried right on with it. In fact, since the first test we have tested seven more varieties: Asian Lagers, Stouts, IPAs, Pumpkin Ales, Belgian Ales, Barley Wines, and Porters. The most recent round of testing was done this last Friday, and even though Science involving this level of intoxication carries with it the inherent dangers of interpersonal violence, casual nudity, and spontaneous dancing, we are happy to report that [most of] us here at Traction were able to once again maintain their professionalism by remaining both pleasant and fully clothed. There was some dancing, however, though we tried to stifle it for the sake of Science.

It’s no small task to peel back the pall of ignorance that complacency so casually throws over our notions of what is a good or a bad beer. Some people will drink a particular beer exclusively because of the label that adorns the can. Sometimes this is due to a nostalgia they feel whilst imbibing that particular beer, and sometimes it’s due to that beer’s social cache. Beer choice can be a very touchy subject for some people, as they can sometimes feel that it says one thing or another about their personality or identity. The beer choices people make can be motivated by so byzantine a maze of notions and ideas as to be nearly impossible to parse out; but by using the Scientific Process we can cleave straight through the mists of our confusion to attain a singular clarity of vision that expands the world before us exponentially.

And it is precisely because of the Herculean nature of this effort that we’d like to share what we have learned with you. From here on out every time we have Beer Science here at Traction, we will be sharing the results with you. Let’s start, then, with our most recent round of testing, shall we?

Beer Science, Porter Perambulation.

The beers, in order of collective preference:

1 - Telegraph Stock Porter (CA)

2 - Speakeasy Payback Porter (CA)

3 - Fuller's London Porter (England)           (tie)

4 - Pt. Reyes Porter (CA)                           (tie) 

5 - Sierra Nevada Porter (CA)

6 - Einstock Toasted Porter (Iceland)

How about that? The young upstart brewery (Telegraph Brewing, est. 2004) takes the top spot.

You may have noticed that most of the Porters we tried were from California. That’s very much by design; if the goal of Science is to create a functional, actionable body of knowledge, then it’s helpful to have that knowledge be as practicably applicable to the people involved in testing as possible. In other words, we try to test beers that we might most often have access to on a regular basis. In this case we chose as many Californian Porters as we could, so that if someone were to discover that they just LOVE themselves a little Speakeasy Payback Porter they’d be able to get some easily**.

So, now that you know how we feel about Porters, we imagine you’re pretty curious to know how other types of beer might stack up. Don’t worry, we’ll be progressively finding out together just about once a quarter, and we’ll be posting the results of those tests here. Check back every so often, and feel free to leave your comments to let us know your feelings on the matter.

Of course, you are absolutely free to take up the mantle of Scientific exploration yourself and participate in this process of progress. In fact, we’d encourage you to do so, for all our sakes***; collective process and peer review are the very foundation of Science. But we will also be perfectly happy to take care of Beer Science for you, of course; it’s part of the collective effort that makes Traction the creative, strategic, and Scientific juggernaut that it is.

Fuck yeah, Science.

* These categories were taken directly from the Beer Judge Certification Program criteria.

** An exception to this is the ‘Outliers’ table set up right next to the Beer Science table – a small number of variations on the theme of Beer Science are made available after testing is completed, just to round out the category. This time it was Maui Brewing’s CoCoNut Porter and Rogue Ale’s Mocha Porter; both delicious, but not quite suitable for testing because of their additional flavor additives.

*** If you’d like more detail regarding Beer Science, setting it up for your own testing, or just want to know which Mexican Lager was ultimately deemed best, feel free to email me about it at ktodd at tractionco dot com. I’ll tell you all you’d like to know.